Trying to Understand Me

I gave you kindness from my fragile heart,
but now it feels shattered and torn apart.
Words said in haste ring clear and true,
what part of me is reflected when I look at you.

I replay moments, searching for sense,
each feeling vivid, each thought intense.
Was it love that grew, or love that strained?
A quiet question that still remains.

My mind replays our looping song,
asking where it all went wrong.
Yet what if pain’s not here to stay,
but simply guiding me another way?

What if each ache, each trembling part,
is showing the map of my tender heart?
What if confusion is how I learn,
to meet myself without words so stern?

For every splinter lets in a bit of light,
illuminating what really feels right.
And in that glow, I start to see
the strength that’s softly shaping me.

So now I breathe, and let it be,
each feeling, a teacher waiting patiently.
Though I break, I also bend
and find this new meaning in the end.

Poem by Sian Williams

Siân Williams